does anyone actually listen to I Should Tell You unless they have a lot of time to kill…like…why you gotta interrupt La Vie Boheme it would be okay if it was at another time…but rlly? Rog and Mimi? You gotta do that? Right in front of our miso soups?

the day is january 1st, 3009. a group of humans listen to boom boom pow. when fergie says that she is so 3008 they all stand shocked and realise. fergie is now behind the times. fergie herself has become 2000 and late. this is unbelievable news to the humans. hours later the planet descends into war and chaos.

I WANT JASON’S D

"Go get a job!!" the person shouted at me.

How has this thought never occurred to me before?! All this time getting unemployment benefit made me believe there were no such thing as jobs in this job market!

I ran out into the street screaming “EVERYBODY! WE CAN JUST GET A JOB!!" Suddenly, a man in a suit walked up to me and instantly employed me, along with all of my benefit sisteren and brethren that were crawling out of their homes.

And on that day, unemployment was solved.